"The Bible contains 6 admonishments to homosexuals and 362 to heterosexuals. This doesn't mean God doesn't love heterosexuals, it's just that they need more supervision."
—Lynn Lavner

"Your harsh email made my goat faint!"
—Dennis Valdron

"Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work."
—Thomas Edison

"The universe is full of magical things patiently waiting for our wits to grow sharper."
—Eden Phillpotts

"All the labors of the ages, all the devotion, all the inspiration, all the noonday brightness of human genius, are destined to extinction in the vast death of the solar system, and the whole temple of Man's achievement must inevitably be buried beneath the debris of a universe in ruins."
—Bertrand Russell

"Either that wallpaper goes or I do."
—reportedly the last words of Oscar Wilde

"Keep out of children and pets."
—warning label on a Korean-made kitchen knife

"Women never forget the men they could've had; men never forget the women they couldn't."
—Oscar Wilde

"My candle burns at both ends; It will not last the night; But, ah, my foes , and oh, my friends—It gives a lovely light!"
—Edna St. Vincent Millay "A Few Figs From Thistles" (1920)

"Prejudices are what fools use for reason."
—Voltaire

"Art is vice. One does not wed it, one rapes it."
—Edgar Degas

"Guns don't kill people. It's the bullets smashing through their vital organs that kill people."
—Unknown

"The most merciful thing in the world, I think, is the inability of the human mind to correlate its contents."
H. P. Lovecraft

"My manner of thinking, so you say, cannot be approved. Do you suppose I care?"
—Marquis de Sade

"Great spirits have always encountered opposition from mediocre minds."
—Albert Einstein

"It's supposed to be automatic, but actually you have to push this button."
—John Brunner

"Tell the truth and run."
—Yugoslav Proverb